Archive for the 'Intention' Category

Mar 03 2015

Vocal Impact Weekly Tip: Purpose and Repartée

Published by under Intention,Public Speaking

http://www.dreamstime.com/stock-photos-conversation-image24115183Is there method to your madness?

Recently, a client asked me how to prepare to network at an upcoming conference that she will be attending. She is somewhat reserved and doesn’t enjoy small talk.  We discussed lots of the basics, but in the end, her strategy wasn’t clear until she understood her intention for talking to people she doesn’t know. And this helped her get a bit more comfortable with the situation.

Compare these two intentions:

My intention is to use small talk when I talk to people and collect business cards so that I can find more people for my network.

vs

My intention is to talk with others in order to discover and explore whether or not there is a possibility of building a relationship that is mutually beneficial. When there is that possibility, I will collect business cards and follow up via email or phone.

True intention is an aim that guides action.  The second intention contains an aim with much more vision than the first, and creates a real purpose for talking to others along with an action plan.  Knowing your intention is the key to getting your communication right in specific situations.  Here are some more tips to make it easier and more productive to network:

1.     Be curious. Ask questions.  This helps you get to know others, and also take the heat off yourself.

2.     Prepare a good, short introductory story about yourself.  Distill it down to your name, what you do, the problem you are seeking to solve in your role, and what results/solutions you are seeing.

3.     Think of three topics you are ready to discuss with others, and practice aloud what you might say about them.

And if you find that you talk so much at conferences that you lose your voice, please see my post Help for tired voices. 

© Aliasching | Dreamstime.comConversation Photo

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Feb 12 2015

Vocal Impact Weekly Tip: The secret to a great Valentine’s Day conversation

Published by under Intention,Musings

8551938948_1c2a58ae9c(Do not read this if you are completely prepared for every upcoming conversation that matters.)

Valentine’s Day can be confusing, if not downright depressing. This often stems from the fact that all those little cupids and hearts put pressure on you to have an important conversation. You stress and sweat about what to say, when to say it and where, and even with whom…and the day just gets closer and closer. Well, never fear. There is a secret to finding the right thing to say at the right time. All you have to do is answer this question honestly and the conversation you need to have will fall into place:

 What is your intention for the conversation?

Now, it’s not just the question, it’s also the opportunity to “get honest with yourself”  that solves the puzzle.  Frankly, that may be the hardest part to figure out. But it’s necessary because intention is an aim that guides your action. If you know your intention, you know what to do.

Consider this–  if you want talk to your special someone about a upcoming ski trip, that’s a very different conversation than talking to them about spending your life together. More importantly, saying you want to have a conversation about skiing when you’re really intent on the bigger conversation only leaves people confused. I’m not saying there can’t be surprises in life.  I am saying that once you get clear about your intention, you’ll be much clearer about what to say, when and where. Of course, the hardest part may still be the action piece, but at least you’ll know what you SHOULD say.

To read how this applies to other conversations that matter, please read my post, Intention: The prescription for an authentic voice.

photo credit:  via photopin (license)

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