Feb 12 2015

The secret to a great Valentine’s Day conversation

Published by at 8:52 PM under Musings

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8551938948_1c2a58ae9c(Do not read this if you are completely prepared for every upcoming conversation that matters.)

Valentine’s Day can be confusing, if not downright depressing. This often stems from the fact that all those little cupids and hearts put pressure on you to have an important conversation. You stress and sweat about what to say, when to say it and where, and even with whom…and the day just gets closer and closer. Well, never fear. There is a secret to finding the right thing to say at the right time. All you have to do is answer this question honestly and the conversation you need to have will fall into place:

 What is your intention for the conversation?

Now, it’s not just the question, it’s also the opportunity to “get honest with yourself”  that solves the puzzle.  Frankly, that may be the hardest part to figure out. But it’s necessary because intention is an aim that guides your action. If you know your intention, you know what to do.

Consider this–  if you want talk to your special someone about a upcoming ski trip, that’s a very different conversation than talking to them about spending your life together. More importantly, saying you want to have a conversation about skiing when you’re really intent on the bigger conversation only leaves people confused. I’m not saying there can’t be surprises in life.  I am saying that once you get clear about your intention, you’ll be much clearer about what to say, when and where. Of course, the hardest part may still be the action piece, but at least you’ll know what you SHOULD say.

To read how this applies to other conversations that matter, please read my post, Intention: The prescription for an authentic voice.

photo credit:  via photopin (license)

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